[concluding part of He's Just a Friend...]
As teenagers, the truth is that we are not yet emotionally mature for relationships. The result is that when we go into such relationships, they are short-lived and cause bad feelings. As Muslims, we are not supposed to go into relationships for the fun of it. Marriage should be the ultimate aim of any relationship. We should also not court for long so that we do not fall into temptation and sin.
If such relationships would not lead to marriage, cause enmity amongst us and make us ashamed in future, why should we go into them? Why should we risk Allaahs punishment for some brief enjoyment or because we want others to feel that we are in vogue? . My mother used to warn my sisters and I against having boyfriends despite pressure from our peers. She would say "Be a village girl today so that you can be a city girl tomorrow." Arent the words of elders words of wisdom? The wisdom of her words never really came to me until after I got married and saw what became of those of my peers who were wayward in their youth.
This article is not meant to crucify those young girls out there who have already fallen into the error of having boyfriends; we all make mistakes. It is not a sin to make mistakes especially out of ignorance. What is important is what we do about our mistakes. Do we learn from them and retrace our steps? Do we sincerely repent to Allaah and promise not to go back to such acts or do we stubbornly continue with them and assume that those who correct us do so out of envy? Do we feel that the adults cant understand how we feel? Remember that every adult was once a youth.
They have passed through this phase. Know also that so many of them would probably have heeded advice then and done things differently if Allaah had allowed them to see into the future. One good advice though; if you have not fallen into this folly, dont! You will regret it if you do. If you are already into it, stop it! Youll regret it if you dont. May Allaah continue in His infinite mercy to guide us onto the right path; the path of those whom He has bestowed His grace and not the path of those who have earned His anger nor of those who went astray (Ameen).
This article was culled from the publications of Deen Communication Limited