The first step in dealing with a problem is being informed about it. That way, you are better equipped to deal with insha Allaah. If a child says she or he has been abused, try to remain calm. Reassure the child that what has happened is not his or her fault. Seek a medical examination and psychological consultation immediately. Know that children can recover from sexual abuse, particularly if they have the support of a caring, available parent.
Get help yourself. It is often very painful to acknowledge that your child has been sexually exploited.
Parents can harm children further if they inappropriately minimize the abuse or if they harbor irrational fears related to the abuse. Therapy Can help caretakers deal with their own feelings about the abuse so that they are able to provide support to their children. If you have been a victim or still being abused ... Then you must know that sexual harassment is a sexual behavior that is unwanted, Often the harasser is someone in a position of formal authority, but harassment occurs between coworkers or peers as well. Men are sometimes harassed, but most victims of harassment are women. The harasser is almost always male. Examples of sexual harassment include suggestive comments, pressure for sexual contact, demands for sex in return for a job or other benefit, sexual jokes. Etc.
Sexual assault is an attack of a sexual nature, which jncludes sexual toudling or rape. Sexual abuse on the other hand is sentially sexual assault but over a prolonged - period of time. Incest, or sexual relations between family members like parents and children, or brothers and sisters, is an example of sexual abuse. But sexual abuse can occur outside of the family too. See the doctor and get medical treatment as soon as possible! You do not have to tell anyone who caused the injury, but it is better for your treatment if you tell the doctor exactly what happened. Sexual harassment, assault and abuse are not uncommon and you are not alone. There are others who have suffered in a similar way. It is not your fault! In the United States, a child is sexually abused every two minutes, according to Senator Christopher Dodd founder of Childrens Caucus. It is also important to remember that no one has the right to sexually assault, attack, harass or abuse another person.
Islam, in particular, is very strong in its condemnation of this behavior, and requires both Muslim men and women to behave in a respectful and modest way with the opposite sex. Dont keep to yourself! Telling someone else about your experience is a way of getting help. If you have been keeping it hidden inside of you because of shame and fear, its time to break this wall. Confide in someone you can trust. This can be an Imam, it could be a close family member or a good friend. Telling someone is a way for you to heal and a step towards doing something about the issue. Think about taking legal action or at least report to the authorities.If you do this, you dont have to press charges, but you may save. someone else from being similarly attacked or abused if police know who the perpetrator was.
Get Out Now! If you are being sexually abused and you are still living with your abuser, you must get out of there immediately. You may not feel strong enough to do this right away, but it is a step you must consider. Taking this into consideration, it is a good idea to keep some important documents with you when you choose to leave. These documents include a birth certificate, passport, citizenship papers, immigration papers, health card, social insurance card, the abusers social insurance number, money and credit cards, checkbook, bankbook, savings bonds, personal telephone and address book, medicine, house keys, drivers license-and car keys,clothing for a few days and valuable jewelry. If you have been thinking of leaving the home to escape violence for a while, start collecting these things. You can save yourself; use your head! Make a protection plan where you will go to escape from the abuse in the home: Decide on some safe place you can go to.This might include the mosque,another home, relatives, friends,hotel, or another place in which you feel safe. "Decide how you will get there.Keep some money with you and some with your family and or friends, so you can leave by taxi. This way, even if you dont have money, you can quickly escape to the friends house by taxi when you feel an attack is imminent. You might even arrange with friends,neighbors or relatives that they will come and pick you up when you feel it is necessary.
Finally, find a longer term safe place Where is the safest place you can stay for a while? It could be family, or a fellow Muslim sister who can open her doors for you Look for those people who can be sympathetic. Start The Healing getCounselling! Dont try to heal alone. There are professionals trained to help those who have been abused and assaulted. A local crisis or womens shelter, sexual assault hotlines, and professionals like counsellors are better able to help you work through your pain. You are not abnormal, you are simply getting proper assistance from someone who knows how to help you deal with this emotionally and psychologically.
Put your trust in Allah and seek strength from Him. Ask Allahs help regularly. He is the Source of strength and guidance, and can and will, Insha Allah, help you get through this. Turn to Him regularly in prayer and supplication when you feel overwhelmed with this situation or any other difficulty. Next in the concluding part of the series: Living with the horror for over 30yrs - A Survivors Account.
This article was culled from the publications of Deen Communication Limited